You Reap What You Sow?

You know, I have always been a big believer in karma. I have seen it in action both in my own life and in the lives of others. Sometimes it is the little things like letting someone turn in front of you in traffic and sometimes its the larger things like giving freely of your time or talents in order to help others. When you do good, good seems to return to you.

On the other hand, when you do bad, bad seems to return as well. Just ask Alexander Kirilov, who learned the hard way that no bad deed goes unpunished. I mean, really?? First of all, who in their right mind looks at a raccoon and goes, "Hmm... I wonder if my ding-dong would fit in there?" And even if someone was loony enough to think it, who in the WORLD would actually try it?? This guy is obviously in need of some therapy and may want to consider the possibility of not drinking again in the future if he is going to blame drunken stupor for this outrageous act. I mean I know Russians make good vodka... but seriously??

Is it the Hippocratic Oath or the Hypocrite Oath?

We have all heard of the Hippocratic Oath. It's the oath that we have always thought of doctors taking. However, according to Wikipedia, it is no longer obligatory or taken by all physicians. Maybe that is why Dr. Christopher Thompson of Brentwood, California felt he was justified in his decision to teach two cyclists "a lesson". I suppose he was one of those doctors who didn't take the oath. Or maybe he just assumed that since these cyclists were not his patients, he didn't have to apply the oath to this situation. Because that is an oath to "do no harm" and I am pretty sure that driving down the road and slamming on your brakes in front of two cyclists had some harm intended. This decision on the part of a 59 year old physician, caused one cyclist to be thrown through the cars rear window and the other to land on theh pavement. As a result of this incident, he is being charged with several felony charges including reckless driving and battery. Apparently, this incident is not the doctor's first run in with cyclist. The LA Times reports that he has attempted to do the same thing to other cyclists.

I could not help but be shocked when I read this article the first time. Just plain old human ethics should keep someone from doing something like this. I can understand the fact that some of these cyclists do ride as if they "own the road". I do understand that it can become frustrating. I don't understand waging war against them in your car. It is not a fair battle. He could have killed these men. This is a man who has promised to preserve life and instead he has put it in harms way. Are we really that angry? Are we really that in need of emotional release? Take a martial arts class, lift some weights, write blogs where you bitch about all the things that make you mad... do something... but not this.

I am sure the California doctor has a good lawyer and it looks like he is sticking to his plea of "not guilty" as of now. The trial is set for March 6th... which I am sure they will delay 15 times... Man, I would love to be the lawyer on the other side of this trial. Of course, before I can do that, I will need to learn how to control my own anger because what I would really want to do is walk across the court room and just knock that hypocrite upside his head. :)

Need a Gift Idea?

You ever have that person that is just impossible to buy for? Maybe Oilfield Jewelry is just what you are looking for. Growing up in South Louisiana, there were a lot of the oilfield worker types. Both of my sisters were either married on in a long term relationship with those types. I suppose if I would not have gotten married so young, I probably would have ended up dating one of those too. And I suppose, if I had, then I might understand how cool it would be to have a sterling silver drill bit charm or a tiny drill bit earring. And I suppose I wouldn't mind spending a lonely Friday night with a six pack of beer and a CD of the Oilfield Cowboy. I also suppose I would understand the humor behind a hard hat label that says "Its a total nipple up" with a topless girl on it.

Now, knowing these oilfield guys, I can tell you that most all of them could do well by stopping in at the Oilfield Bible Fellowship Church. There are a lot of sins to be forgiven with those guys! Possibly they could all get together and sing some roughneck songs.

You are probably wondering how in the world I ended up on these pages. Well, I have an explanation... sort of. You see, I use GMAIL and in GMAIL, they give you what is called "web clips" along the top of your inbox. Some of the the clips are things like quotes and some are website "advertisements". They are typically based on the subjects of your emails. So, for instance, if someone sent me an email and in the body of the email asked me about recipes for spaghetti, it is quite possible that I will get a web clip that shows a link for spaghetti recipes. It is actually a pretty cool concept and I try to make a habit of clicking the links that catch my attention. (After all, GMail is free and I really like it and I would really like to keep it that way.) So, I am not exactly sure what email I got that caused the web clip for "Oilfield Jewelry" to show up on the top of my email, but nonetheless, I clicked it. Once I was there I was trapped by some odd sense of curiousity. I can't help but wonder, if my brother-in-law, the die hard oilfield worker, was still alive... would he be really excited about this?

The End of the 30th Year

Okay, so tomorrow I turn 31. What better thing to do than to write a blog recognizing all the glory of my 30th year. Let me think about that for a second...

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well, okay... maybe I should talk about the how glorious my 31st year is going to be. :)

Seriously, for all the craziness that my 29th year brought me, my 30th was relatively calm. I began the year as a college graduate and I am ending it applying for law school. I began the year in a fairly new relationship and I am ending it in the same relationship that is stronger than I ever could have imagined. I began the year in a job that I thought for sure I would be walking out on any day and I am ending it working for the same company about to move into a position that I am really excited about. I began the year scared about what my future will hold and I am ending it... well, I am still scared... Hey, 3 out of 4 ain't bad, right??

So, what's the big deal about turning 31 anyway? I will tell you what... I will officially be "in my thirties". Think about that for a second. Up through the age of 29, I was "in my 20s" which was great, especially when I could get away with that at 29. When I turned 30, I was just that... 30. But now, now I will be 31 and I will be "in my 30s" which is a description that I just can't believe. I mean really? How is that possible? How does time go so quickly? My son, he just turned 9. He will be 10 by the end of this year... 10. In double digits. Where did time go?

I know what you are all thinking... what a dumb blog Jen... do you think you are the only person to feel this way? NO! I don't! But I am the one who writes the blogs and so I can write about whatever I want and at this moment, I want to write about the fact that I can't freaking believe I am going to be 31 tomorrow. I can't believe that it is 2009 and that we just put our first African American President in the White House. I can't believe that I am going to start law school in the fall and I can't believe that my little brother is a college graduate and that my niece is going to be a mom. There is an entire list of things I can't believe, but on the top of that at this very moment is that I am having a birthday tomorrow and it doesn't even feel like it. It feels too soon... Hell, I still can't believe that Christmas came and went - I never even put up a tree!

BLINK! And there it goes. Wow. Okay, I figure I should end this particular post here and change gears so that this doesn't turn into a completely rambling blog. Until the next topic tickles my fancy....

Blog Topics

Okay, so I am in this "write like crazy" mode. I want to write all the time. I have been writing a lot on my personal blog/journal, but that is mainly mindless ramblings from my mind where I over think everything in my life. I started this creative blog with the idea of writing on more random topics. I am thinking of starting a story line - sort of like a short story - but at this very moment, I am sitting at a Starbucks staring at my screen and waiting for the time to meet my friend for a little girl time and so my time is limited. I did a few google searches... "Conversation Starters" and "Blog Topic Ideas". The latter found a few good ideas, sites worth bookmarking that I might come back to. I have been trying to peruse more websites lately to read editorials, new stories, etc to help my mind go. I don't want to write about something someone else already wrote about. I more am hoping that something I see will trigger another memory or another story line or some insane emotion that will give me the burst I need.

In the past, when I get to this point with writing, I have a tendency to just stop. This time, I am trying to push through that urge and just keep writing something, even if it is mindless and dumb. I am just trying to keep my fingers moving and my mind churning so that maybe, just maybe I will launch into some great writing frenzy. In the meantime, send me some ideas!! Give me a topic, ask me a question, whatever! I was laughing just last night about how people I know (personally and professionaly) tend to ask me questions all the time without even taking the time to attempt to think of the answer themselves. The funniest thing about that is that it is not like I am a walking encyclopedia of knowledge or super intelligent - I simply am able to quickly scan what I know for a fact, what I have heard, and what I assume to be true - and give an answer that makes them happy (or at least gives them an answer). The joke was that I should start my own advice column - like "Just Ask Jen". Maybe if I get enough blog topics and questions, I will change the name of this site to exactly that.

Let me clarify something - I don't want to turn this blog into a political rant, unless I am feel like ranting about politics. I don't want to turn this blog into a relationship advice site, unless I feel like talking about relationships. I don't want to talk about the weather, unless it is unreasonably crappy weather and it is putting me in a foul mood. I am not the deep writer, full of big words and long exhaustingly sentences. I typically write to engage myself and my readers. I like to make people laugh so the typical blog will have a funny twist no matter how depressing the topic.

So send me some ideas... post a comment to the blog, send me an email.... come on... Just Ask Jen!!! :)

The First Kiss

There was a news story out about six months ago about the singer Fergie and the actor Mario Lopez where Mario told newspapers that Fergie was his first kiss. They met on the set of the popular 80's show Kid's Incorporated. For whatever reason, this became a topic of discussion in the office last week which got us on the topic of "Would you marry your first kiss?" I actually have one friend from high school who did that - and they have been married for over ten years now. I started scraping back through my foggy memories of childhood - I clearly remember my first kiss - but I want to cheat a little and not count him. The first boy I kissed was a friend of my sister and the only reason I kissed him was because he was being nice to me and flirting with me to keep me entertained so that I wouldn't tell my mom that my sister had boys over while she was gone. As they all went to leave, and all the teen couples were kissing, my sister's friend thought it would be great to taunt me into kissing that boy. So, amid shouts of things like "Just open your mouth and put your tongue in!" I had my first kiss. That one doesn't count, I don't think - because it was not really of my own accord. Besides, if I had to bet money on it... that boy is most likely in jail or has at least spent a considerable amount of time there. So there are no funny stories and the answer to the question here would be a quick and decisive NO.

So I move on to the first boy I kissed on my own - alone - without the pressure of others. Now this boy - there are at least a couple of funny stories here. His name was Brad. I lived in apartments and he lived in the neighborhood right behind us. He moved there over the summer and his mom was a school teacher at another elementary school and so he was going to school with her instead of with all the kids he lived near. I am not sure why he liked me specifically. There were lots of girls our age in the apartments and I don't think I was especially flirty or anything. Our first kiss was while we were sitting on top of the swingset in the playground of the apartments. I remember thinking that he seemed so nervous I thought he might fall off and then I would have just laughed at him. It was a sweet kiss. Short, not sloppy... just sweet.

Brad's mom loved me to death. She would let me come over every day and do homework with Brad. We were allowed to stay in his room for hours without her even peeping in. Don't get me wrong - we were very well behaved. Most of the time we were actually doing homework or watching TV or just talking about whatever 5th graders find interesting (for the life of me I have no idea what that is). At some point, about 2 months into the school year, his mom transferred him into my school - and guess what - he was put in MY class! Now let me explain a small childhood victory to you. In all of my childhood and high school years, Brad was the only boy I really remember dating that actually went to school with me. As a matter of fact, he may be the reason I never dated anyone who went to school with me - but I will get to that shortly. He was a cutie! Blond hair, big blue eyes, olive colored skin that looked like he had just been to the beach, pouty lips and a dimple on one of his cheeks. As he was shown into the classroom immediately the whispers started from the girls in the room. No one in my class knew he was my boyfriend and so my heart was pounding out of my chest. For a minute, I was nervous that he might decide he didn't want to be my boyfriend any more because he might like one of the other girls in my class better. But all my worries faded away when he walked down the aisle, smilied at me and ran his hand across my shoulder as he passed. I immediately began to tell the curious girls around me his whole story - how he was transferring from another school, how he lived right behind me, and how he was MY boyfriend. It is hands down one of the best "victories" I can remember in my younger years.

Life was good for a while. Time frames elude me, but I think it was about a month later when his mom took me shopping at the local Wal-Mart with them. She needed to pick up a few things and I tagged along for the ride. While there, we passed a rack of local tourism clothing that supported our community and our state. As we passed, his mom's eye caught on this red t-shirt that said "Somebody in Louisiana Loves Me" in big black letters, with a heart in place of the word love. She thought it would be super cute if she got two of those t-shirts, one for me and one for Brad. She really did see us as the cutest thing ever. Thinking back to the way she saw me, I wish I could remember more about what I was like at that time. Anyhow, after tossing those shirts in the basket and continue down the aisle, her eye was once more drawn to another rack. Bicycle shorts. Oh - don't laugh - they were cool back then. Go back to the beginning of this blog and click on the Kids Incorporated link and you will see! Well, she found bicycle shorts that were black with red and yellow stripes down the side that just went perfectly with the t-shirts. She just had to buy us those too! So here we were with matching outfits. Now, at the time - we thought it was very cool. We are were already planning (against what later would seem to be better judgment) to wear them to school the next day.

So, the next morning, we met at the bus stop in our matching outfits and waited for the bus while holding hands. Were we not just the cutest thing? I will say that our friends who caught the bus at the same stop thought it was just as cute and kept telling us how lucky we were that his mom bought that for us. I believe it was on the bus ride, as I heard a couple of hushed comments from some kids sitting behind us that I started to think this wasn't such a good idea. I believe Brad had the same idea based on his tense posture and his lack of silliness on the ride to school. We arrived and I decided I would just suck it up. It was only one day - I could survive anything for one day.

The first half of the day was not so bad. A couple of sarcastic "awww - aren't you two so cute" comments from classmates was about the worst of it. But then it was lunch time. We headed to the cafeteria and then out to the playground. The school I went to had only two grades - 5th and 6th. We were in 5th, therefore we were the "freshmen". In 6th grade, there were the "Andreas". There were two of them - best friends and just as mean and snotty as you could imagine. They had a couple of other friends, but the two Andreas were the ones you always heard from.

Let me paint you a little picture of what I looked like in 5th grade. Actually, I can do one better - I have a picture.

From Old Family Photos

What you can't really see in that picture is how damn skinny I was. I had no curves, no hips, no anything. I was just a tall, skinny rail of a kid. My legs were like twigs. This is where the problem came in - with those damn skinny legs. You see, bicycle shorts, by the pure nature of them, are meant to be fitted shorts used for cycling. However, when you are my age, have no meat on your bones, but are still required to buy a size that allows for the shorts to be long enough to wear to school - you end up with loose bicycle shorts.

This is where the Andreas come in. As we were walking out to the playground, slightly more confident since the morning had not been so bad, we passed the Andreas. I am pretty sure one of them said somthing like "OH - MY - GOD!" or some other colloquialism from those days. I tensed again. Here it comes. So the typical laughter and thinks like "Isn't that cute?" and "Look - they match!" came from behind as they followed us out to the playground. That is when one of the Andreas noticed - I was wearing bicycle shorts, and they were loose. "Hey, aren't those tights supposed to be TIGHT?" Rolls of laughter started behind me. That is where the chant began. The Andreas (and I am sure a few of their evil friends) began chanting "Your tights are loose, your tights are loose" in this sort of schoolyard rap version of hazing. I just wanted to crawl into a hole and die. That was the longest recess of my life - the longest day for that matter. I also believe that was the beginning of the decline of my first relationship. You see, for some reason - I was mad at HIM for this whole situation. After all, it was HIS mom who had bought these stupid outfits for us in the first place!

I ran inside after getting off the bus and peeled those clothes off so fast you would have thought they were on fire. I think I shoved them in the bottom of my closet or something. I can't be positive of where they ended up, but I can be positive that I NEVER wore them again. After that day, as you would imagine, the chants didn't stop. "Your tights are loose" was now a favorite song of a lot of my classmates. It seemed that the only way I could disassociate myself with that song was to break up with Brad. I needed something to distract people. Evidently, so did he. His distraction tactic was slightly different. He started telling anyone who would listen that him and I were engaging in hot and heavy make out sessions at my house after school. He even went so far as to tell people he had gotten to second base and almost to third but my mom came home. I was FURIOUS. Sure, we had kissed several times by this point, but they were always the same short and sweet kisses - nothing more.

This gave me the ammo I needed - we were over. I broke up with him after school, in the same playground, sitting on top of the same swingset where we had our first kiss. So naturally, being a stinky, rotten boy... he had to go to school and tell his own version of the story. He said that we had to break up because his mom caught us in his bed with my shirt off. THE NERVE. We are inside for recess that day because it had been raining and our teacher was out of the classroom. As Brad sat in his desk, I stood up, leaned across the aisle and started yelling at him about telling lies and that I was going to kick his butt. You know what he did? He pulled my hair! He grabbed a handful of my long blond hair and just pulled for all it was worth - and didn't let go. As I was struggling to regain my balance - there was a desk between him and I that I was practically being pulled on top of - my hero, a boy by the name of Robbie who had a crush on me since the 4th grade, came running over and punched Brad straight in the nose! Brad immediately let go of my hair, grabbed his nose and in a whiny voice wailed, "Why'd you have to hit me, Robbie?" to which the classroom rolled with laughter.

The teacher came in, brought both boys outside and tried to regain order in the classroom. I think both Robbie and Brad got detention and I somehow came out of it as a superstar. Well, maybe not a superstar, but at least as the cool girl who had a boy hit another boy just to protect her. The best part? The new chant on the bus, in the classroom and on the playground was now a unified, whiny version of "Why'd you have to hit me, Robbie?". No more "Your tights are loose!"

Brad and I no longer spoke after that. I moved the summer after that so we didn't live near each other any more but when 6th grade started and he was nowhere to be seen, I found out from a friend who still lived near him that he had been enrolled in the Catholic school in town. I have no idea if this had something to do with me or the torment he received or if it was just something his mother had planned all along - but either way, he was gone and the memories of the "Somebody in Louisiana Loves Me" outfit were far behind me.

So, coming back around to the original question, "Would I marry my first kiss?" the funny thing is, in a lot of ways, I think I did! As I recalled this story, I saw a lot of similarities in the personality of Brad and of my ex-husband. Brad and I spent one year in school together again in high school. We didn't talk or hang out, but we did have a couple of classes together and I could see his personality and remembered thinking how shy he had seemed then compared to the way he was in 5th grade. Somehow, he had grown more introverted. And unfortunately for him, Robbie (the boxer) was still around and remembered him the moment he saw him which started another, although short lived, round of "Why'd you have to hit me Robbie?"

I am sure Brad turned out to be a nice guy. Probably middle of the road sort of worker bee - nothing out of the ordinary, nothing too risky or daring. I like to think he learned his lesson about lying about girls. And for the life of me, I wish I could remember his last name and find him on MySpace or Facebook - I would love to send him an email with the subject of "Your Tights Are Loose" and nothing else and see how quickly this whole story comes back to him!!!

I'm Bored

I have been spending a lot of time recently with my boyfriend and his teenage son and I have learned one of most popular phrases in the teenage vocabulary is "I'm Bored". Now, I don't know how many people who will read this have had the luxury of spending time with 13 year old kids these days, but it seems that being "bored" is a common theme among adolescents these days. Just the other day I was watching an episode of Two and A Half Men where Jake, the teenage boy, was grounded from basically everything. After being given his punishment, his dad tells him to go find something to do that he isn't punished from. He sulks out of the room only to return less than three seconds later saying, "I'm Bored." Now, if you haven't been around this generation recently, you may laugh and think that it is being over-exaggerated. It's not.

Now, I don't know if it is that they are genuinely bored or if it is that in today's world, they find so much stimulation from so many sources (video games, computers, MySpace, Facebook, television, movies, cell phones, text messages, etc) that having even two minutes of time where their mind is not being used seems like eternity to them. I guess this is where being an avid reader pays off. You see, I am never bored. Even in the times where I feel there is absolutely nothing to do, I can grab a book. Thanks to the invention of the Kindle, if I don't like the book I am reading, I can simply download a new one without even getting out of my chair. I get to occupy my mind in someone else's real or imagined world. I think the ability to read for entertainment is something that is sadly slipping through society's fingers. All of our technology allows us to get information fed to us visually and audibly with no real imagination required.

I had a conversation with my 9 year old son the other day where I reminded him about the the time he learned how to sing Silent Night in sign language. He tried to explain to me how he didn't remember how to do that anymore because he didn't really need to know sign language since he didn't know anyone who couldn't hear. I tried to get him to imagine that one day, he could meet someone who had a lot of cool stories to share, maybe another kid who liked to play all the same video games as him and that if he still knew and understood sign language, he could communicate with that child about the things they both enjoyed. His response, "Pfft, like I am EVER going to meet any one like that!" I could not get him to imagine with me this one possibility. It's no surprise to me then when I try to get him to read a book these days. "Books are boring," he says. "They are all full of fake stories and just a bunch of words." I have tried to explain to him that when you read the words, you make the movies in your head. He wants no part of it. He used to love to read when he was younger. He would sit in his room for an hour or more reading the books on his bookshelf. Recently, when faced with the fact that his bedroom is becoming overcrowded he announced that it would be "fine to take out his bookshelf because he never reads anyway." UGH.

And so, what I fear is that I too will be innundated with thousands of "I'm Bored" statements coming from my own son in the coming years. It appears that as part of the new millenium, we need to add a new chapter to that ever helpful Parenting Manual titled "How To Entertain Your Child 24/7". Until that comes out, I think I will just pretend that I am hearing impaired and only respond in sign... who knows, that might help to spark his imagination again.

Just want to have fun :)

I know what you are all thinking... Jennifer can not possibly be starting yet another blog! But I am!! I have my family and friends blog, but that is basically a "life" blog. I will continue to write on that one to talk about the things that are going on in my life. But lately, I have found myself consumed with the desire to do some "creative writing" such as short stories, poetry, and just plain silliness about whatever I feel the need for. Previously, I have done this sort of writing in my own private journals and blogs - those that I don't share with anyone. But some of my biggest fans love to read the creative silliness I come up with so I thought I would just start another blog and add some of you to the email list that gets the blog updates. Blogger now has a new feature that lets me add up to ten email addresses to the automatic send email so I am not sure what this will look like when you get it. I imagine it is just going to look like an email from "A Girl In the World". If you reply to the email, you will be emailing me directly. If you would like to visit the original blog site (or share the site with anyone) the address would be http://creativesideofjen.blogspot.com/

Feel free to share the site with anyone and watch for some creative blurbs in the very near future. I am pretty sure that I will use this one more than anything else because it is sort of a "no rules" blog that I can write as little or as much as I want and pretty much just have creative freedom. I am really excited about this one. Feel free to suggest topic ideas as well. I do my best writing "on demand".

Enjoy the Creative Side of Jen!!

Coming Soon...

Musings from the creative mind of Jen.